This Too Will Pass

Normally, I write blog posts ahead of Wednesday when they are scheduled to be posted. Today is a different day. It is Wednesday. I’m feeling quite flustered with the amount on my plate. It may be the illusion of an overflowing plate, but regardless, I’m feeling overwhelmed. This isn’t the good overflowing plate like you might have on your third visit to the buffet at The Great Wall, Jade Palace, or any other Chinese food place. So this blog post may include more errors than usual. Pardon them, please. This is a reminder to myself that I post here simply to keep writing. If nothing else, I’ve done that successfully this week.

I received an unexpected letter this weekend, the details of which will remain on the paper it was written. I intend to write back and I actually started to before I was interrupted last Friday. Currently, my emotional bandwidth is taken up. So, if you’re reading this, person who wrote me the letter, please be patient. I will reply once I am capable of processing my thoughts.

I finally had an MRI on my knee that I tweaked on my first day skiing back in December. Looks like a “complete ACL tear.” I’ll admit this bummed me out considerably. My first concern is the 160th Sailor’s Creek reenactment in April. As more information has come through, it sounds like it may be similar to the 160th Antietam. If that is the case, I want to go more than I want to fix my knee. Of course, it is more smart to fix the knee sooner so I can attend events over the summer, but events like this are often once-a-year opportunities. The immersion offered grants us living historians better insight into the Civil War. I am especially a fan of moving campsites each night. It keeps us on our toes.

I did just devour the crab rangoons off my plate: grading. That metaphor is terrible. When I was in college, my friends and I would be doing something like playing video games or doing homework. Suddenly, Nate, Luke, or Tonner would stand up and utter the words: crab rangoons. We’d drop everything and jump in the car to the Chinese restaurant. Each of us ordered a large crab rangoon plate and consumed it in its entirety. Now I’ll be craving some. Crab rangoons are something that tastes good, in my opinion, briefly. Like crab rangoons, grading should be in small increments. Unfortunately, it has piled up and I have finally caught up. That is a good feeling…much better than finishing off a dozen or more crab rangoons.

After planning out the next three weeks for my classes and being on duty for a decent portion of the weekend, I am zonked. I will take a few nights this week to recover. I think much of that time will be spent alone. I have enjoyed living alone again. Sure, I miss having an intimate connection with someone, but this space is good for me. I’m taking time to figure out the hobbies that truly draw me in: reenacting (which I miss), writing, and film photography. I have found some great people here to spend time with. I’m anxious to reconnect with distant friends and family soon.

In closing, writing this has taken away some of the tension I feel. Sure, there’s a decent amount going on, but it can always be worse. My struggles – a letter to write, surgery to plan for, and balancing my alone time – are minor compared to what it could be. In one of my classes, we are practicing meditation and mindfulness. Today is a good day to implement the work I have the kids doing. My mantra today: this too will pass.